I Am The Fall Grinch


I have found my mental health works on a two-year cycle usually. The months of October and November tend to be the hardest for me. Jokingly my partner and I call me the Fall Grinch. It's so true though. Ever since I was little, I always hated the Fall, especially Halloween. I know, something that the Fall Grinch would say. Maybe Jim Carrey will let me take up the role in the next rendition of The Grinch, except in this rendition, climbing up a mountain with a bunch of caramel and pumpkin-spiced lattes to throw over some cliff with a bunch of pumpkins I am bowling and throwing off the cliff! Right around October, I usually notice my mental health starting to go awry. Not like normal mental health where I have overwhelming feelings and sensations. No, it's more like a short-lived dysthymic period. Except very different because those who suffer from dysthymia tend to suffer for at least years on end, for me it's more like two months. Sending those reading this who suffered/ing, and/or know someone living/ed with dysthymia love your way, and I am thinking about you! I’ve found that October and November are rough times for me. Times when people love the Fall Festivals and drink their lovely apple-infused drinks, I am over here feeling well as I shared before, like the Fall Grinch moping over all the fun people are having in the Fall.I first noticed this pattern for me during college. During my sophomore year of college, I went through a long period of depression. It was awful! During this time, I was questioning my whole life and all the decisions I have made, and if I was doing the right things. I was hitting pretty low lows for myself. Those who know how depression can really corrode and deteriorate your spirit, and energy, know what this is like.